My Boston child, at age 2.5.

Right now, Boston is supposed to be asleep in his bed. But in fact, he is not sleeping. I can hear him through the baby monitor at this very moment, and it sounds a little something like:

"I'm gon' dance all night to da best song ebbbberr!! Go go go, yeah yeah yeah!"

(brief pause)

"Hey mom? Hey mom? Hey mom? Hey mom.... Hey Dad?"


"I Wolverine. Look at my sarp caws! OooooWOOOOOOO!!" (that was a wolf howl, all right)


"MOM! Hey. Dats my shadow! I see it! Mom come see it! My shadow!"

...so yeah. We're really getting somewhere with this whole early bedtime thing. Can I get a what-what for that one. You win some, you lose some. Except I guess he is still in his bed, stuck in his room, so I'm counting it as a win anyways.

But you guys. How did I not know how hilarious two-and-a-half-year-olds were, like before I had one?? I mean, I feel like at least thirty-five times a day I'm cracking up at the kid and saying "Hold on. I have to text that to your dad!" (or else I'll forget but I'll try to remember at dinner and I'll just butcher it and Jord will sit there like "Mehhh, it's not that funny babe, but I still love you." You know? hashtag momprobz)

I don't know, I just feel like suddenly he's really figuring out this whole toddlerdom thing. Like yeah, this isn't too bad! I don't have to always do what they say! In fact, I can do whatever the heck I want! This is amaaaaazing!

Here are a few of my recent Boston faves:

-On our way home today:

Bost: Hey dad, you come home wif us. Play ba-ket-ball me? Momma, you make dinnder.

-He wanted me to turn on "The Magic School Bus" the other day, and I was ignoring him, just doing my thing. (you do it too. you know you do!) So it went like this:

"Mom. Mom. Mom. MOM. MOM! MOM!!!" (and then finally, in exasperation)

"HEY! McMurtrey Bod! I wanna watch Magic skoo bus!"  (yeah. McMurtrey bod. I don't even)

-As we were getting ready to go to church on Sunday, Bost suddenly looked up at me and said,

"Momma! You Boo-tiful. I yub youuuu....  (and just as I was melting)

...I gotta go potty now. Kay?"

So the moral of this story: toddlers are such good entertainment. Like if you're ever feeling lousy, come on over. Boston will happily perk you up with his crazy conversations. Oh, and tell you the origin stories of every Marvel superhero.

Gear up, folks!